Poem: War’s Lament

Okay, well, despite the title, I did this one without even really thinking about it. Since I said I would, I’ll post it. But you know, I’m not sure how well I like it. The rule for this one– it’s not quite freeverse– was couplets. I wanted to do series of couplets. I think I did pretty well– as far as experiments go.  But again, there I go off on a tangent. I’ll probably work on this one again sometime. Until then, FORWARD! Ever forward!

Enjoy if you can. As always, comments, critiques, etc. I love to hear feedback. It makes me a better person! Truly it does!

—-

War’s Lament

By Sam Oliver [Eris]

 

The faces as they pass

Are shining, golden glass

Like elemental fire

Untouched by heart’s desire

Her soul is made of stone

With silence cold as bone

To fate, we meet again

Inside that wildest fen

Are you the first to come?

Thy mind will strike thee dumb

Should purity ever fail

Remember past the Veil

For we are darkest night

The star that shines unbright

Tis we who cry in dark

As souls do disembark

From ships that sail away

Will you defeat today?

From blood to bone to soul

From stone to earth to clay

Our minds are one and whole

Our hearts not disarray’d

For we are goblins true

Demons and monsters too

With claws and teeth in red

We come to take the dead

So battle on with foes

Struck down with blades of snow

As ice feasts on their eyes

And cold creeps up thy thighs

Let bodies froze by time

Lay there until this rhyme

Is done.

—–

 

I still count it as somewhat freeverse. I think it’s okay, and it’s certainly interesting that it has this weird rhyming scheme. But by the same token I think there are definitely areas I could improve on– that is to say, it doesn’t really get going until the middle. I like the feel of it okay, and for a spur-of-the-moment poem I think it’s good. Another constraint I put on myself for this one was the meter- which is set at three sets of two syllables per line. That was fun to try to figure out. I also like the word ‘unbright’. It’s not really a word. Really it isn’t. But it’s fun to make them up every once in a while, and it feels like it should be a word!

-Eris

© 2012  Sam Oliver [Eris of Discord]

Poem: Soul – Star – Hope

Sometimes I go crazy and get super sad for no real reason. When I feel like that I always need to spend some time cooling down, and the easiest, best way to do that is to write poetry. This one, of course, also had the bonus of relieving some pressure because I had to finish it for my Creative Writing class, but you know, that’s probably okay.

If I get more than one of these suckers, I’ll snap up a poetry section.

Anyway, I’ve babbled on enough. I’ll do myself a favor and hush up and let you guys enjoy.

 

Soul – Star – Hope

A freeverse poem by Sam Oliver [Eris]

The stars burn

Bright

Like shining frozen

Shapes–

In the rain

And

Always too far

They

Said it was enough

But

Their words snake

Down

Dodge the drops–

With

You I won’t

Drown

Inside.

 

Listen to your heart

While it still beats free

Listen to the rain

Drumming on me

A shower’d molten glass

Will not the world compare

With every song in brass

The echoes draw me near

 

Closer

Like the fire

Embers

In my hair

Whipping

Through the wind

I can

Feel the stare

Of sun

On my head

I will

Not be slain

By ice

In the vein

Of my heart.

 

Listen to your soul

While it flows for me

Listen to the pain

When it tears you free

Feel every voice

Aching to be heard

Still your every need

A caged, little bird

 

To sin wherein it

Stands

Like a tall tower

 

To hate wherein it

Sways

Unfazed by love’s power

 

To fearsome bitter

Cold

Swept from my heart

 

To frost on fingers’

Nails

Like iron in the dark.

 

Listen to your mind

While it sings so sweet

Listen to your hope

Arrested in its sleep

Cry for every love

Taken back unkempt

But live for who you are

And not for who you’ve dreamt

You should be.

 

 

Comments, questions, critiques? C’mon, I love hearing feedback! If you don’t put it out here, I can’t very well answer it now, can I?

Not that I want you to feel pressured. If you really don’t have anything to say and you just thought it was nice, feel free to snap that on too, I always like encouragement. On the other hand, if you think it’s total crap, TELL ME WHY PLEASE and tell it to me straight. I don’t like flame any more than the next gal/guy, but I’m a firm believer in honesty and I don’t aim to please everyone. I’d rather know the flaws so I can correct them than stay ignorant of them, and I need perspectives of all types in order to improve! I thrive on criticism and encouragement!

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed it at least, since it was such a joy to write.

-Eris