Poem: These Long Winter Halls

The long winter halls

These long winter halls

Have faded in time

Have faded in rhyme

and reason untold

unbound by the shape

of the skeleton who sits

at the throne

by the foot

of the tall statue’s gold.

 

And the tall statue bold,

who stands above all

and stares sternly down at the skeleton thrall

once a king but not now

not a king anymore

his key unlocks nothing

but a small silver door

at the foot of the throne

between cold gold knees

as the skeleton’s jaws now

clack

in the breeze

that rolls through the halls

these cold mountain halls

these cold winter halls

these long winter halls

where the skeleton sits

on his throne, and in thrall

a king of nothing, no

of nothing

at all

but a pause and a shift and a creak in his jaw

from the wind

that blows

through this long

winter

hall.

 

 

©2013 Sam Oliver (Eris)

 

Here you go guys. Got another poem. Working on like five stories. Prolly’ll post one or two of them. When, you ask?? When they’re done!

Love,

Eris

 

Goal: One hundred short stories in a year / NO VIDEO GAME CHALLENGE

So the deal with that is, I want to write one hundred short stories by the end of the year. I want to publish half of them to actual publishers, and half of them here on the blog for free. I may change that later, but what that MEANS is, I’m going to be writing two short stories a week, and posting ONE short story a week here.

Does it seem ambitious?? WELL IT IS! But it’s also going to be crazy fun and I really can’t wait. This news post is kind of ridiculous because I’m going to post the first one of those stories DIRECTLY after I publish this, so I’m not even really gonna tag this. Much. :3

Be seeing you a lot more this year. A LOT more. Check back each week for a new short story?? The update times may vary, but I can tell you that this is something I am not gonna shirk on. This is basically a job.

ONLY I LOVE IT. And the careers people at college say that’s basically the difference between a job and a career?? Golly!

Thinking of all of you,-Eris

 

PS-ISH: For the duration, I’m not gonna be playing online video games. The only video gaming I will be doing is going to be AFTER and ONLY after I have done everything on the agenda for the day AND I’ve checked to make sure there’s nothing better to do. Twice.

I’ll keep you updated on how that is going regularly. It has been a total blast so far!

Poem: Black Despair – Rise, Phoenix

The darkness overwhelms

It hides within your soul

It shatters all you are

It whispers of false gold

 

Can you hear it moan

As it runs down through your self

As the slickest of its touches

Violates your wealth

Of feeling?

 

You try to pull away

To push it from your heart

To break free from its grip

And escape before the start

But

Never can you free yourself

Not even as you try

And whisper to the cold dark sky

Why?

 

And why indeed

You ask

In head

Heart

And hand

With lips that shine with your own tears

As the dark ignores your demands

Your pleas

Your cries

 

Soundlessly you sob

Into the gritty street

Quietly you cry

As the world around you greets it

With silence

Just

Silence.

 

 

Steal back the night.

Rise up to your feet.

Grab it by the collar

And pull it back to meet

A sharpened stake of truth

To drive into its heart

It never should have had you

Not even from the start.

 

You are not its toy

Not fate’s simple thing

To be tugged

To be pulled

To be yanked from ring to ring

Of people who all talk

Of nothing and with no thing

To say.

 

Break free of this darkness. Make it yours instead.

It violates your pride

Now rise up from the dead

The cold

The wet

Ashes of your despair

Burning once again

The phoenix who was broken

Will now live yet once more

 

If and only if

 

The darkness that’s in store

Is brought to pay

for

Its crimes.

 

So burn now love

And burn now bright

To capture and corner the black

You once let it take you

Now you’ll take it back-

And rise-

And soar.

 

 

©2012 Sam Oliver (Eris)

 

I love writing poetry.

-Eris

Poem: Skychild

Hers is a love

Deep and true

Like leaves that fall from the sky

Our child smiles once

And then pulls away

I feel

I’m watching her die

Her hand to her lips

The other, her heart

I feel the beat of her rush

She wants to call out

But I bid her to stay

She’ll only

Get in the way

His way.

She’ll only

Get in the way.

 

His wings spread wide

I watch him soar

My soul soars with him

In tandem

Wings beat out

Wing beats down

I wish that I could fly with them

 

I feel so useless

Standing here

My mate on edge at my side

I feel so helpless

Holding her hand

And wishing he needn’t ride

The wind

Alone.

I’ll only get in his way, you know

I’ve heard it once before

I’ll only get in his way

I’m sure

He really needs must

Go.

 

The wind is free against my face

My heart is in my hands

I feel it jump with every beat

And at my body’s demands

I twist in the sky

So vibrantly blue

The sun piercing through my sight

Blazing bright, the only star

To never see the night

Back down to the ground

With a smile on my lips

It feels too wide to be true

I take my place at my mothers’ sides

And know now who I belong to-

 

The sky.

—-

©2012 Sam Oliver (Eris)

Hey everyone. Been a bit! Poem! Read!

<3s,

Eris

Fluid Gender – No, Not the Kind you Drink

Well, since this sort of thing- anything about gender, really- interests me waaayyy more than is probably healthy, I figured I could spare a post or two on it. I was right, so here it is!

First off, I’m going to give a bit of a definition of the undefinable.

Gender- what the heck is it? It’s a little voice in your head that tells you what’s ‘proper’ for you. Generally speaking, if you’ve got ovaries and breasts and girl bits between your legs you’re thought of by the public as a girl, right? And if you’ve got boy bits and are relatively flat without the ability to breastfeed, you’re thought of as a boy?

Okay, we’re square there, right? That seems pretty easy.  If you’re really sheltered (don’t feel bad if you are, I’m trying to inform, not to alienate), maybe you haven’t heard of this next bit, so bear with me a moment and try to understand and not judge!

Sometimes, and we’re getting a better idea of why this happens, a boy (which we already defined) will be born and, to introduce another element to it, his mind will not accept that his body is male.

Why is that important?

Well, the mind is incredibly important! If the boy grows up in a social environment filled with boys who all like their bodies and he hates his on the inside, that could have disastrous effects on his self-esteem! Since schools can be cruel in the United States (I can’t speak for elsewhere), he could be alienated for any expression of what he feels to be his true self!

He might be convinced that the only way out is suicide, and he might never truly understand what exactly is wrong until he’s already dead.

Just for fun, I’m going to avoid using scientific terms here and call this not-boy exactly what I feel he is.

He’s a person. It doesn’t even really matter what he wants his body to look like, except to him and the people who want him to be happy. If he decides he wants breasts and ovaries and goes to have surgery, hey! Good for him! I believe in living your own dream. If your dream is to change your body type entirely, that’s wonderful. It’s hard! It’s not an easy path. But it’s strange, isn’t it? Isn’t it amazing all the different types of people there are on the world? Alienating them will do nothing! We should stand up for the hurt, and help those who have big dreams and so little support!

But that’s a tangent. People will use all different kinds of weird terms to describe otherly-gendered folk. Some people refer to a gender ‘line’ and blurring it. I think of it as an immense sphere. Everyone fits in there somewhere. I don’t think it really matters where so long as you just remember that there is a place there for EVERYONE. Not between boy or girl or male or female or any of that silliness- it’s a sphere! What lines? Where you identify is just down to you, your mind, your culture, and your heart. Above all, follow your heart. If it means so much to you, no one can take that away.

I’m fluid gendered, for instance. I don’t just stay in one place in the great big sphere of gender. I bounce around. I’d like to be whatever I feel at the moment. It’d be pretty neat if I had some way to shapeshift like that out here in the meatspace world, but I’m content with being able to express myself through the clothes I wear, the people I meet and the things that I do, at least for now.

I might feel boyish one moment and completely feminine the next. There’s no serious stability with me and you know, some people might find that really scary! As much as I love free expression, not everyone might agree with me!

If I’m not careful, I could get beat up for not matching others’ expectations, for being wildly different. (hee. It’s funny because everyone is different and everyone is in a sliiightly different place in the gender sphere) Sometimes people are killed just for being themselves! Isn’t that crazy?

But I’m not worried about that. I’ll live every moment I have to its fullest and be myself as plain as can be. I can only hope other people follow my example and come to accept that even though we all fit in a different place, we all share hopes, dreams and thoughts, there’s something in common that you can find with just about anyone if you try hard enough, and so there’s really no reason to get into arguments at all-

Unless you just like tossin’ discord around and messing with people. That’s fine too. There’s a place on Earth for everyone, and even if there wasn’t I’m sure there’re other planets where they’ll be able to fit in eventually. ❤

I suppose the entirely of what I want to say is that-

To everyone their own.

Ah, a further note.

The disconnect between someone’s born sex and their mind is called many things depending on what the so-called symptoms are- it happens to people with girl bits or boy bits or something inbetween (which we are so not getting into just yet), and it happens all the time. If you’re curious about it, you can look up such terms as:

Transgender

Gender dysphoria

bigender

If you’re REALLLY curious about it and no one is giving you the answers you want, you can toss me an email or comment.

I’ll get back to it eventually and if I don’t know the answer, I’ll look it up for you to the best of my ability!

Of course, my opinion is biased. But so is pretty much everyone’s, so don’t worry so much about that. I’m not gonna judge or anything. (what kind of hypocrite would that even make me I don’t)

Anyway. That’s all I have for now.

Love out to those that need it (Which, by the way, includes all of my friends, family and others in or out of the blogosphere),

-Eris

Poem: A Sin in the Dark

A Sin in the Dark

An experimental poem by Sam Oliver [Eris]

She stands there like stone

 

Still as the moon

And twice as cold

 

Should I approach her

I know what she’ll say

Better to wait here

And hope that she stays

 

Still I might see her

Eyes glance this way

I may’ve imagined it

But who is to say?

She could be staring me

Down from behind

But how can I tell

She pays me a mind?

Her heart be true

 

This much you know

It’s not what she’ll show

 

But what lurks inside

The cold of her heart

Like winter’s first frost

It tears you apart

 

A warm night will melt her

Or force her away

If her soul is too soft

Perhaps she won’t stay

You cannot imagine

She’ll want to conform

Scented with jasmine

Perhaps now she’ll warm

I don’t like his look

 

I don’t like his eyes

Or the way that he lies

 

Through teeth far too white

I watch in his smile

The things I find bite

Are the cunning and guile

 

Can he not see

He’s no interest to me!

I want to be free of him badly

If he won’t away

I swear that this day

I’ll stand here and leave him

Quite gladly

Alone.

 

 

©2012 Sam Oliver [Eris]

——

Oh, hi everyone. Yes, I’m still alive. New poem? NEW POEM! ❤

Experimental 1-2-4-8-1-2-4-8-1-2-4-8 line poem. ❤ Still probably classified as freeverse. I don’t know what I’d call it otherwise!

It’s the Leap Year! Leap Year Day! Happy birthday all of you born today. Comes around only once every four years, so if you were born in 2000 you are now officially three years old! Congratulations!

…No. That’s not how it works. :c

Birthday is not the same as age and anyone who tells you otherwise is a NUT.

<3’s,

-Eris

The Afterword

It’s cold out. Not REALLY cold out, because it never gets that way in Florida, but it’s cold enough to make me shiver. I started work on and nearly finished an epilogue to go with this rather strange end to a rather strange book, but instead ended up scrapping it (I may rewrite/complete it and release it at a later date).

The characters have come a long way and learned quite a bit since the very start of this book, and so have I. Learning with them has been a experience I know I’ll treasure. It’s strange though- throughout the whole thing I never once really thought of it as ‘writing a book’ or ‘writing a novel’. It was just one chapter, one scene at a time.

Happily enough, it’s Winter that I started on and Winter that I ended with, and in a rather wonderfully lovely bit of serendipitous fun, my story ended not quite a year after I began it. I’d put ‘END’ or something after it, but no, I think I’m just going to leave this as part of the book instead and say that it’s been immense fun watching these characters grow, from Summer to Winter to Spring to Fall, from Thomas and Silky, to any of the Dragons. I’ve really enjoyed the heck out of myself writing this story out. I can’t wait to see how it’ll end up- but in the meantime, in what I’m going to call the ‘Writer’s Rest’, I’m gonna be putting it down and not even looking at it for as long as it takes to finish my next project. It’ll remain here until I see fit to go back and edit it, piece be piece, and I’ll only allow myself to touch it after I first step back and let it lie the way it is.

Of course, what I mean by this is that I’m going to be taking full advantage of this break to be pumping out short stories, mini-projects and other things until I can get a firm start on my next main. I don’t imagine it’ll make the site any more cluttered and hopeless to navigate than it already is. I won’t start posting the main project until I get a decent buffer up, but do check back because, believe it or not, I have a few short story ideas that I want to set up here, and I just love it when people read my work whatever they have to say about it afterwards.

To pad out the length of this already comfortably long afterword even more, I’d like to pay thanks to all the supportive family, friends and acquaintances who helped me make this book and site a possibility.  So thank you kindly, everyone. I hope you continue to read if you do so often, and if you don’t I hope that you take it up. Words are some of the most important things I feel we ever share.

Happy holidays and a joyful new year,

-Eris

 

AUTHOR’S NOTE: This is the very tail end of the book ‘Demimind’. If you’re reading this and wondering what I’m talking about- which, with the number of people who actually check back to this site, is unlikely- you are probably not in the right spot. Near the header at the top of the page, the one with the wintery tree, there is a black band underneath the image with links to the book itself- as well as a link to a chapter page.

NOTE ON THE AUTHOR’S NOTE: If you like reading books back to front, though, do continue and disregard everything I said above. Far be it from me to tell people how they should read an online representation of my creativity and skill (or lack of either) as a writer.

NOTE ON THE AUTHOR’S NOTE, NOTE: Can you tell I’m feeling giddy about finishing this story? In case it isn’t perfectly obvious by now, I’m feeling giddy about finishing my story.